UPTIGHTNESS

i think this is the main problem of Jordanian people. don't ask me why but its like the wall everyone hides behind. what happened to simplicity, being clear and genuine, did it become so backward and makes you socially naive now?

i live in a community of uptight poeple, there is no way i can personally relax, i am uptight myself, i react to it by being part of it otherwise "i wont be good enough or knowledgable enough", family is the only place i feel like myself beside two girls i know, i lost faith in others and the fact that they could be genuine and not showing layers over layers of mind control and business crap.

anyways, im quoting this part from an article i found a person talking about uptightness:

People are uptight. Lots of them. And it’s bad. Bad for them, bad for their co-workers, families, and organizations. Uptight people create uptight policies. Uptight policies stifle creativity, happiness, and good, healthy relationships. it appears as if large groups of reactionary, really uptight people have picked opposite sides on an unimportant issue and are fighting as if winning the fight (for either side) would make the world a substantially better place.

I feel the same way about all political correctness in general. It is a symptom of uptightness - it’s about being so afraid to make a social mistake that we have to couch ideas in the most blandly incomprehensible way possible.

what is uptightness, anyway:

Aside from not being a noun, which is how I used it in the title, “uptightness” is not hard to define. Uptight behavior is expending more energy on a cause than can be justified by the best possible outcome of the effort, usually motivated by insecurity of some sort. In other words, it is treating a trivial issue as if it were paramount, not because you have a substantial, measurable interest in the outcome, but because the issue plays on your particular weaknesses as a person.

and here is an illustration of uptightness in a greeting card:

"Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, our best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low-stress, non-addictive, gender-neutral celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice, or secular practices of your choice, with respect for the religious/secular persuasion and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all. We also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling and medically uncomplicated recognition of the generally accepted calendar year 2007, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make America great. Not to imply that America is necessarily greater than any other country nor the only America in the Western Hemisphere And without regard to the race, creed, color, age, physical ability, religious faith or sexual preference of the wishes. By accepting these greetings you are accepting these terms. This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for herself or himself or others, and is void where prohibited by law and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher. This wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one year or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first, and warranty is limited to replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher.”

what i found at my doorstep 10 minutes ago

Just minutes ago i went to the place next door to buy a sandwich and shaneeneh, and as i walked out the gate, i saw a young boy staring at the ground, i passed by him wondering what he is doing then i saw a fur ball, i stopped and asked him what-is-this??

He looked at me and said "QUNFOTH"!!

he was soo scared with pins all up and face down towards the corner of the main gate of our neighbors house, how did it get to the main street and where did it come from, where was it raised to become this big?! the boy was worried about the Hedgehog and was trying to see if there is anyone indoor to make sure that the Hedgehog might be theirs. i told him i will help you put him in a box since no one was answering in the neighbors house. i went back to my place looking for a box and something to carry him with, we put the side of the box underneath the hedgehog and tried to fit him in and flipped the box, he landed on his back and i saw its face! he is sooo cute poor scared little fellow.


Wow this is the first time my life to see a Qunfoth, he has a very tiny black nose, and tiny hands like a mouse with pins curbed all around itself! then i put my hand on its back, i dont know how it felt, its like grass, it felt funny and pinny, not furish, i told the boy you can touch it now, try, he is your pet, it was amazing to see his face, people thought we were crazy staring at a box at 12 pm and then my sister went out, i told her do you think he throws pins at peope for self defense, she looked at me and said : " he is not Sonic!" hehe, we kept wondering what he eats and what to do with him, the boy said he has no information about it what so ever but he wanted to keep it, i asked him to put it in his backyard till tomorrow, maybe he would put some water and green stuff for him to eat, now i was looking hedgehogs, it turned out that he eats insects, worms and roots. anyways, the boy lives at the end of the street and he told me if his parents asked him to get rid of him he will tell me :)


CHILDREN CARE

You Passed Weird 6 Months Ago and Thank God For My Mind

Disclaimer: im still feeling good about the new year despite what you are going to read.

The E-mail:
its weird how everything we do has a social dimension and we characterise it to become part of our own bubble full with hazy borders that make you want to be with people with similar beliefs and you promote those beliefs where the sole unconscious purpose is to protect yourself from the bubble which is chalking you and keeping you sane.

i recieved this e-mail from an engineering
technical local society:

لماذا لا نحتفل برأس السنة مثل بقية
الناس؟
كنت أتسأل عن هذا.. كما يتسأل عنه كثير من المسلمين اليوم..
و لما
فكرت في الأمر مليا وجدت أن الاحتفال بمضي سنة من عمرنا غباء كبير ..
وأعنى ما
أقول ..
نعم غباء كبير ،،
لأنه ليس في تلك المناسبة داعي للاحتفال بقدر ما
فيها من دواعي للحزن والندم ..
فعلى ماذا نحتفل ؟
على خسارة سنة من
العمر!
أم على اقتراب الأجل !
أم نحتفل بمخالفة أمر النبي الأمي عليه الصلاة
والسلام
بتطبيقنا طقوس الضالين و نفرح بمعصية الرب العظيم!
عجبت لعقل من وضع
هذا الموعد و تلك المناسبة للاحتفال..!
وعجبت لمن يحتفل بهذه المناسبة من
المسلمين الغافلين!
أليس الإنسان يحزن إذا خسر شيء من مقتنياته التافهة ،
فكيف يفرح بخسران شيء من أغلى ما لديه وهو (العمر) ..؟
أم نحتفل بالخسارة
لأن الغرب الكافر يفعل ذلك بجهالة..!!
و إذا علمنا أننا لن نرجع يوما فات من
العمر و لو أنفقنا ما في الأرض جميعا
فحق لنا إن نحزن 360 مرة في رأس السنة بدل
أن نحتفل
و إذا تذكرنا خطايانا التي ارتكبناها في الأيام الماضية حق لنا أن نتوب
إلى الله و نخضع لأمره و نبتغى رضاه بكل ما نملك من حول و قوة عسى أن نكفر عن شيء
مما سطر في كتابنا في السنة الماضية و ليس أن نحتفل (نزيد الطين بلة) و نخالف أمر
رسول الله صلى الله عليه و سلم الذي أمرنا بمخالفة اليهود و النصارى و نهانا عن
الاحتفال بأعيادهم و ممارسة طقوسهم (الغبية) و أفراحهم (الدنية).
أحبتي في الله
لن ينال رضي الله من سعى في معصيته ..
و لن يفرح بالنعيم من فرح بما يورد
الجحيم..

i sit and i wonder.. i work with those people

The Class:
i went to school, took a quiz and our professor yelled at us, being very disappointed because almost none got it right although he explained the whole principle last wednesday, he said that he feels very sorry for our generation (no, actually he felt sorry for his effort) and that if any of us was his son, he would have disciplined him or maybe hit him because the level of carelessness is not tolerable. one of the students said, your son would report you to the police, so the professor answered " wladi m2addabin, iza darabet il wa7ad minhom bi2ouli udrobni kaman 3ashanni ghaltan"

...oh my professor, (i really love the way you explain the classes) you are one of the best teachers,, but you would not mind hitting your daughter to preserve respect. why do you have to instil fear to induce change. all i wanna tell you is that today is not yesterday.. you have to face it. i hope one day we will find an alternative other than fear to push people to the harder right option.

The spirit of preparation:

through facebook
a fellow engineering student sends this mass mail:

Subject: الغش أفضل وسياه للنجاح
اقتربت
الامتحانات النهائية و عدنا للدراسة و التعب,والأمر الذي لا يعرفه معظمنا أن
الدراسة لا تفيد و السهر و التعب لا يعطي مفعول,انك ترهق جسدك و عقلك من أجل
امتحان,وأنت تستطيع أن تنجح و تحرز أعلى الدرجات بوسيلة أخرى ألا وهي الغش,و هي
وسيلة مضمونة و ناجحة و مجربة تحكمها الظروف لكن ان تعاملت معها بذكاء و شجاعة فسوف
تحصل على نتائج عظيمة.
صدقوني ليس هناك أجمل من شعور النجاح ب مادة عن طريق الغش
خاصة اذا لم تكن تعرف شيئا عنها,فأنا من تجربتي الشخصية و الطويلة في مجال الغش
اكتشفت أن الغش يولد شعورا رائعا,أن تذهب الى امتحان صعب و ما تكون عارف اشي و تقعد
جنب واحد نيرد مقطع المادة و لما تطلع النتيجة تلاقي حالك جايب قده أو يمكن أعلى
منه و تنظر له نظرة استهزاء و استعلاء و تقول له بكل سخرية : أنا الي مش عارف
اشيبالمادة أجيب أعلى منك يا نيرد هههههه
.سأعرض لكم بعض الخطوات الأساسية للغش
و نرجو أن تفيدونا بما لديكم من معلومات.
أولا.عندما تمارس عملية الغش أو تريد
البدء بذلك ,أوعك تيجي عينك ب عين المراقب,غش ب راحتك و لا تحاول تتطلع على
المراقب,لأنه بمجرد انه يشوفك بتتطلع عليه بفهم انك بدك تغش.
ثانيا.وانت بالبيت
قبل الامتحان,حاول انك تكتب برشومة تكون اصغر ما يمكن بس فيها اكبر عدد من
المعلومات واكتيها ب خط واضح و حطها بالكم تبع البلوزة أو البوط أو اذا كان قلبك
قوي حطها خلال الأمتحان بين وراق الامتحان.
ثالثا.من أهم القوانين بالغش انك تغش
بأعصاب مرتاحة و ولا كأنك بتعمل اشي,و مهما صار لا تخاف ولا تتوتر لأنه دغري رح
يبين عليك, وحتى لو مسكك المراقب تصرف بهدوء أعصاب و أنكر ثم انكر ثم انكر انك كنت
تغش.
.رابعا.اذا كان الك شب صاحبك شاطر أو بنت صاحبتك شاطرة , روح قبل الامتحان
ب نص ساعة و اول ما تشوفه او تشوفها ضلك ملزق و وين ما راح روح ورااا حتى لو دخل او
دخلت على الحمام و لما يبلش الامتحان اقعد جنبه ولا تسمح لحدا غيرك يقرب عليه و
حاول غش منه قد ما تقدر بهدوء و تركيز ومش غلط تقرا شوية قران عشان ربنا يخليك تشوف
ورقة صاحبكمنيح
.خامسا.انت او انتي بالامتحان ما تهتم ب حدا غير حالك,لو ابوك
قاعد جنبك ما اتغششه الا لما تتأكد انك غشيت منيح.
سادسا لما تغش من حدا جنبك
خليك قاسي,اذا ما بده يغششك افقعه ب وجهو ,خوفه.و على قولة المثل " ان لم تستحي
فاصنع ما شأت " , ما تستحي من حدا بالامتحان.الي بستحي بتروح عليه يا
جماعة.
سابعا.من الطرق المضمونة بالغش انك تكتب بعض المعلومات على الدرج الي بدك
تقدم عليه الامتحان,حاول اكتب بخط واضح لكن عشوائي عشان التمويه, و جيب معك قلم حبر
من لون غير عن الي بدك اتجاوب فيه الامتحان عشان اذا المراقب شاف الدرج تبعك ما
يقدر يمسك عليك دليل.
ثامنا.من المفضل انك تلبس طاقية و نزلها على وجهك شوي عشان
عيونك يوخدو راحتهم.
تاسعا.حاول زبط المراقب قبل أو خلال الامتحان ب كم كلمة
لطيفة و كبر راسه شوي و حسسه انه اشي مهم عشان اذا شافك بتغش يعمل حالو مش
شايف.
.عاشرا.اذا كان الامتحان دوائر خلي واحد من النيردات الي بتعرفهم يبعتلك
الدوائر على المسجات بالموبيل أو ممكن و هو طالع من الامتحان يرمي جنبك ورقة او
محرمة عليها الأجوبة و هاي الطرق أثبتت فعاليتها على مر السنين و بتجربتي
الشخصية.
أخيرا صدقوني انا نجحت ب 50% من موادي بالغش و مثلي الكثير من شباب
الوطن الأوفياء.الدراسة ما بتجيب غير وجع الراس و ياما طلاب تعبوا و درسو و ما
جاوبو اشي بالامتحان و ياما ناس راحو على الامتحان ما بعرفو اشي بالمادة و جابو
علامات كاملة و صدقوني الفئة الأخيرة لها التسبة الأكبر.

im so sorry to say that this is what is happening for real.

Different from every year, i went out to party yesterday, i felt like i dont live in Amman, or that i dont know whats going with Amman if this is the new Amman, its so filled with contradictions,, is the country its people??
we rented a car me and my friends and the plan was lets go dine, go to the movies then go party. we ate la7ata insa6a7na and the bill was too much and it was just the brand name that we paid for, we made the countdown at the movies, it was coool, i just wouldnt shut up, we were watching Hitmaaaan,, agent 47 .. the seats were so great and comfy

lets get to the part where i was left in shock.. its 1 AM and we wanted to go to party, we managed to get free enterance for one of those parties, w ya raitna ma ru7na! we lost our way to the place, we got there something like 1:40

i was so excited about the music, the lights, the dancing.. seriously my feet were moving on their own,, the music was great, but the atmosphere was very disgusting,, we didnt stay for long, most of the people there were early 20s, you'd see a guy and his girlfriend kissing on the dance floor, very touchy, he'd be reaching out to her butt and she is fine,, i was wondering to myself, are there any two in here who are in love, or is it the rawness of it all, revealed when the controlling mask is gone,, another two gays kissing and i mean it and they were so proud and they wanted us to see and they would dance infront of us as if they are saying to hell you hate us we're gonna do it more and more, there was a gay guy hitting on another (straight)guy so he went and kissed him and that guy slapped him in the face! God that was hilarious, there were lesbians too, in threes! even girls after guys as well... i was so shocked, but not as much as my friends because i knew it existed and somehow i've heard it so much that the image belief of existance is passing Ok signal in my head... i really dont know if its right or wrong....
what i discovered is that people dont know how to dance! wallah they dont!
they just get as close as they can get to their partners, this is their idea of dancing!!!
i was like, run for your life, i danced on three songs, had a drink and went home.
there is a video im waiting for my friend to upload it,, that should be fun to see.

i learned that life is not ideal by any means, and that people dont see life from the same scope, never will, i learned that negative expectations should be always placed among your forecast, it should be embraced and dealt with. it shouldn't demotivate you because this is reality and its no better anywhere else.

and know that you can always do better.
we crossed to 2008, Happy New Year :)