Monday 19 May 2008

the fish bowl

i just have a thought and i want to put it down, i cant keep the thought off my head that whoever told us about free will lied. and that whatever drive we have has a physically bounded cause, i keep thinking about a second of time in my memory and i ask myself "where did that moment go" "Where is the past?" [i am so serious] will i ever see what happened at that moment ever again, "no", i recognize that i am a trace of all the past that i witnessed, and that whatever in my head from chemical reactions is a representation of that memory, but how manipulative is that since there is no substance to it? over the years, memories get distorted, stories get changed, every revision of it changes something because we naturally build on thoughts, so i guess sometimes keeping something unvisited makes it closer to the real experience or that moment in time.

in a way, whatever thoughts we have didnt come from outer space and is no spark of genius because its due to the environment that made us bounded to certain type of being that evolves but mostly its not up to us. a natural disaster can change the course of life and can change the overall level of existing intelligence.

i was staring at a fish bowl and i was thinking of the fish, fish are dumb and sloppy like. what are humans in that sense for a larger being who looks from outside? do fish know anything about the outside waters. what kind of computers will tell them of whats outside the waters and what kind of imagination will tell what are humans like and how we behave,, maybe air to them is like space to us. you will know what lungs mean when you experience space, we cant be outside this sphere as the plain human beings for reasons caused by the sphere where we first came to be and makes us belong to the sphere and cant do outside it because we adapted and nothing is forcing us to change. why is my question? why we are here and not there ? how important is it to be relative to the sphere? where was i and can i evolve by choice knowing that i need more functionality to get out of here, why do we behave far from animals, why do we think before we behave, do we really think? this question scares me.

maybe we are dumb and weird too, and we look human like because of what the earth is like.
sometimes i count how many living beings are in my house, i started with the people, then looking at the trees and pets, then considering the insects and flies then thinking of the infinite possibilities in the distance between me and the tree that i see, i was thinking of my chemistry and how it drives me. how my thoughts are part of this chemistry and i see my limits when i look at the fish.

i think there is no free will. this is what im thinking. why are humans awake is another story.

they used to say " we are here to build earth " .... hmmmm.... i think destroy is more likely to be true.

5 comments:

aboSamoor said...

I can not understand the point in this !!!
what about exams !!! you said you won't blog till their end :P

Tala said...

hala Ramy :D Welcome here Abosamoor, i dont have a point in this one, i wanted to delete it bas was too late, its just open ended questions that i dont have answers to, you can consider it some mental processing in the non-useful part of women's brains, irrational, illogical, the part that hurts when women are asked to think or do real life work :PP ^^

the illusion of effort, that fits it best.

Anonymous said...

Morning Taltoool :D

I do believe there's free will but we tend to forget how strong it is with all the things bounding us, and it's often that we find it difficult to get out of our comfort zone..
As for human beings and fish, I don't think that fish has changed much since 500 years ago, human beings haven't evolved either, at least not psychically, but they have produced an enormous amount of thoughts, inventions, poetry, music..they have been creative and will continue to be..
and unlike the fish, one day we might be able to get out of our sphere cuz simply we're a smarter specie.
and it's more likely than not that there are other much intelligent beings out there that perceive us as we perceive those fish.

I don't think there's one single reason we share for being here, each has to find his/her own purpose..

Hope i made some sense hehe!

Tala said...

Hey Rasha, thanks for your comment =)

i realize that this shouldnt affect us on a day to day basis, and there is a lot of exploring to do before searching for boundaries of what cant be. but i was wondering about this, if fish are less intelligent and we are of higher intelligence, why can't we understand them and make them realize our existance and exchange messages. same for all higher beings, like if i want to get a message through to a fish, to any other specie on earth. why can't this happen. fish and other animals have better motoring skills from humans, but they can't count or compare for example. sometimes i find animals better in their response to inputs, i tried it several times. so there are kind of types of signals they respond to and another thing maybe training them to think is getting to wake them up. maybe at some point of life a higher being wanted us to think and they interfered in our intelligence.

but as a life cycle, we are bounded. i agree that we are not here for one particular reason, i still have so many things that i dont understand, but its alright, it will make sense one day.

Tala said...

ps this is a very badly written post, i will rewrite it from a different approach so dont bother with the so many inconsistencies right now.